Wander with Me: Pattaya

Forgive me for my lack of posts. When you’re writing freelance full time and spewing out at least 3,000 words a day on stuff like mortgages and video surveillance, you won’t have much energy to write anything else. Anyhow, this is a very much delayed account of my trip to Pattaya with my friends from home some 2 weekends ago.

My friend, A, who currently lives and works in Singapore, flew in to Bangkok Friday night to visit me and my friend, D, who was nearing the end of his Bangkok vacation. It was going to be a reunion of sorts and we have been it planning for weeks. A was only staying until Sunday afternoon so there really wasn’t enough time to go anywhere far, and since the 3 of us have always been serious beachcombers, we weren’t left with much of a choice – Pattaya. I’ve never been there but I’ve heard so many things about the place, most of them quite bad, so I figured it was going to be very interesting.

But I digress, as I usually do. A’s flight was delayed for hours and when she finally walked out of the arrival gate at 2 AM, well, let’s just say a lot of shrieking and jumping up and down were involved. A looked fantastic, as always. She’s filled out a bit, which really suited her. I took them home with me to crash. She had her first taste of Thai street food at 3 AM. I didn’t get a wink of sleep that night. After all, somebody needed to be the mother hen and for some reason, that’s a job that always falls on me.

I woke my charges up at the crack of dawn. We headed to the Mo Chit bus station where we boarded the bus to Pattaya. The trip was uneventful. We slept through most of it. We got to Pattaya a little over 2 hours later and took a songthaew to Pattaya Beach. We had breakfast at a McDonald’s, the only McDonald’s in Thailand that I’ve been in that actually served proper breakfast food (Egg McMuffins, anyone?).

We spent a good part of the morning looking for a place to stay and we finally decided on a beach front hotel called Natural Beach. It was quite nice. We were given a room with a terrace and a view of the pool and D was given an extra bed, so we were all quite satisfied with the accommodation.

As soon as we were all settled, we slipped into our swim wear and crossed the street to the beach, where we were greeted by quite an appalling sight. Pattaya Beach has got to be the worst stretch of beach I’ve ever seen. It was cramped, dirty, and very much ruined. Needless to say, we were very disappointed and very outraged. Once again, like in Patong Beach in Phuket, I was struck by the people’s negligence. Everybody was so caught up in making money that they’d ruin perfectly good beaches just to get it. It was sad. Since we can’t be made to swim in all that muck, we swam in the hotel pool instead.

We decided to go on an afternoon tour and we were taken to the Million Years Stone Park and Pattaya Crocodile Farm. We had loads of fun feeding the fishes and the crocodiles. A had her picture taken with an elephant, D and I with a tiger cub. We watched a camel pee for over 10 minutes, saw giant catfishes the size of baby whales, and watched a crocodile show, which included a guy sticking various parts of his body in the crocodiles’ heads.

We were taken back to the hotel at the end of the day. Tired, we all took a nap for a couple of hours. By 9 PM, we were ready to hit the famous Walking Street and see Pattaya in all its gaudy glory.

We had dinner at a seaside restaurant. We watched tourists walking in with their scantily clad Thai whores. It was exploitation at its very best. Both the tourists and working girls were busily getting something out of each other, so I couldn’t really feel sorry for anybody. At the table beside ours there were 2 obese American men and a tiny Thai girl in even tinier hot pants. At some point, one of the fat men said to her in a really loud voice: “Do you like my brother? Because he’s going to bite your ass.” Gross. We were out of that restaurant pronto.

We all planned to see a girl-on-girl sex show but none of us was daring enough to just walk into a club and take a seat. We must have walked through Walking Street quite a number of times before we were led by a dodgy little man to a go-go club, the name of which escapes me. The experience was educational, to say the least. We saw vaginas perform daring, even miraculous, feats. Indeed, all sorts of possibilities were opened up that night. The whole of Walking Street was so ugly and dirty but we couldn’t look away. In all its ugliness, it was much too fascinating.

We ended the night by getting a nice Thai massage on the way back to the hotel. I treated my friends to my favorite banana and chocolate pancakes. The moment our heads hit our pillows, we all passed out.

We planned to get an early start back to Bangkok so we can visit some markets before A leaves in the afternoon. Unfortunately, we all woke up rather late. We didn’t get to leave Pattaya until noon. Still, it left us with enough time to shop a bit in Chatuchak Market. We never got to visit Chatuchak, however, because A lost her wallet somewhere. We spent the next few hours looking for that wallet. We checked the bus we were on and even called the Pattaya bus station but it was nowhere to be found.

Dejected, I took A back to the airport. D didn’t come along because he was leaving Thailand the next day and he needed to spend time with his sister. I stayed with A long enough to share a burger with her. At the customs gate, we hugged each other goodbye and promised that we will do it again soon.

I wonder if we ever will. Sometimes I think that weekend was the last we’ll ever spend together as a group. After all, in a few months’ time, D will be migrating to New Zealand. A will still be living in Singapore. And as for me, well, God only knows where my feet will take me then.

We have come a long way from our headsets and workstations and beaches back home, my friends and I. And even if that trip was indeed our last together, it’s at least something that will never be forgotten. As long as we have the pictures proudly displayed on Friendster, we’ll always have each other. And in all its dirty sand, cracked pavements, and ugly neon, we’ll always have Pattaya.

Girl, Lonely in Bangkok

It’s my only day off for the week, and I could choose to stay cooped up in my apartment all day or I could do some exploring. The latter was definitely more appealing. After all, I am in a new city with so many sights that I am yet to see. I am also in a new city with very little money. Not only do I have to watch my spending, I also have to make sure that I could find my way home without having to take a taxi.

I thought about spending the day writing and people watching in Chatuchak Park. I come from a city completely devoid of parks so the ones here in Bangkok are a bit of a novelty for me. I decided against it, however, because it is scorching hot today, the way Bangkok usually is after a night of rain.

After some thought, I took the BTS sky train to Siam, took the first exit, and found myself in Siam Paragon – a gigantic monolith of steel and concrete right at the heart of Siam Square. It’s no wonder of nature, but it is indeed a marvel of modern architecture, with its 9 floors of designer shops selling everything from clothes, shoes, computers, books, cars, and the list could go on and on. It is where the crème de la crème of Bangkok converge. I suddenly found myself in the presence of fashion legends that I’ve only ever heard of in many an episode of Sex and the City – Jimmy Choo(!), Balenciaga, Dolce and Gabbana, Pucci, etc. When I saw a real Ferrari up close, I knew I was on hallowed ground, and in my gauzy rainbow skirt, t-shirt, and flip-flops, I felt completely out of place. But I was in retail heaven and it would’ve taken an army to drag me out of the place. I knew I couldn’t afford anything, but it didn’t mean that I can’t look.

After walking past Jimmy Choo for what seemed like the 50th time (I couldn’t bring myself to go inside the shop. I was afraid I’d break something!), I was starving. There was a floor dedicated entirely to restaurants so I figured I could find the cheapest meal possible, or starve. I was surprised to see that everything was so affordable. I thought the food would be ridiculously overpriced like everything else. I found a little Italian restaurant, thinking that I’m finally going to satisfy my craving for pasta. I got lasagna, or at least something that they called lasagna. If that thing was any indication of the state of Italian food in Bangkok, I may never eat good pasta again. And yes, it had cilantro, lots and lots of cilantro.

I burned off my rather disappointing lunch by checking out the other floors. They had about 20 cinemas on the top floor. Once again, I was surprised to see that tickets were priced quite reasonably. I wasn’t in the mood for a movie, though, so I continued exploring. I was really excited to find a huge bookstore with a big selection of English books. The best thing about it is you can actually just sit there all day and read a book if you want to. I was tempted, but I wanted to be home before dark so I tore myself away from an annotated copy of Pablo Neruda’s poetry and hurriedly got down the nearest escalator. There’s a huge aquarium on the bottom floor where you can see all sorts of marine animals. I wanted to check it out but the tickets were quite expensive so I figured I’ll do it some other time when I’m not pinching pennies. I would’ve wanted to see that shark up close.

I walked around a bit more and found myself in an area called The Lagoon. There’s a manmade pond with huge kois, a wooden bridge, and a wooden dock where I sat, listening to the pond’s bubbling filter and almost feeling like I was in a beach somewhere. I looked up and the ceiling above the pond was painted black and spattered with tiny, twinkling lights to mimic the night sky. It was rather pretty.

I sat there for a long time just writing. I watched lovers strolling past, and I couldn’t help but feel a pang. I watched families spending quality time together, and I couldn’t help but miss mine. I watched a group of friends laughing hysterically about something, and I couldn’t help but feel lonely. It’s sad, really, I’m on the most exciting adventure of my life and I have nobody to share it with.

But as I sat there, watching the kois swim lazily and the pages of my new notebook as it absorbed the black ink of my pen, I realized that I wasn’t really sad. I chose this life, and I really won’t have it any other way. There will be time for family, friends, and maybe a boyfriend later. For now, this is time spent for myself.

Of Cilantro and Homesickness

I’ve been feeling quite blah today so this post is going to be completely random. Bear with me.

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Probably my least favorite spice (or vegetable) is cilantro or coriander. Unfortunately, it seems that it’s also the favorite spice (or vegetable) among Thai people. I’ve had cilantro on my food since the day I arrived in Bangkok. Usually, I just set the pesky leaves aside. It doesn’t really have any effect on the dish’s general taste as long as you’re not chewing it.

Anyway, I decided to treat myself to a different lunch today, one that didn’t involve street food. I went to the mall nearest my office, Future Park. I decided I wanted chicken so I went to KFC with the idea of ordering my favorite Zinger meal. While I was on queue, however, I happened to glance at the colorful menu behind the counter and I saw it – the spicy chicken meal. It looked good, owing to the fact that it had a lot of onions. For the record, I love, love, love onions. I eat ‘em raw, fried, baked, chopped, un-chopped, whole, you name it. But I digress. I decided right there and then to get the spicy chicken meal.

After much pointing and gesturing with the food server, I finally got my exciting new dish. With tray in hand, I headed to the nearest corner table, eagerly started eating, and promptly gagged. The whole thing was crawling with cilantro. The worst thing was I could barely see the evil leaves so I couldn’t set them aside. They were chopped so fine that you’d need a microscope to see them.

Because I couldn’t possibly waste 77 baht on a meal I took only one bite of, I forced myself to eat the rest of it, taking big gulps of my Pepsi in between bites. I managed to finish almost three quarters of it. The sad thing was it would’ve been a very good meal. It was a tad too spicy but hey, this is Thailand. And unfortunately, because this is Thailand, I’m in cilantro hell. Indeed, it was the best of times, and it was the worst of times.

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Unable to successfully get the nasty taste of cilantro out of my mouth with a large Pepsi, I decided I deserved an ice cream. I walked around the mall, looking for Hawell’s, my favorite ice cream stall with their excellent 15-baht vanilla ice cream cone dipped in amazing chocolate fudge. I never did get to find Hawell’s.

There it was, it’s pretty pink sign a beacon for cilantro victims everywhere – Baskin and Robbins! It shouldn’t be a big deal, I know, but I come from a city where there isn’t a single Baskin and Robbins. I remember there was one when I was about 12 but for some reason, they closed it down, and I never saw a Baskin and Robbins again. I’m not even sure if they have Baskin and Robbins in Manila. I’ve never seen any on my frequent trips to the capital.

But once again, I digress. I eagerly perused the divine display of ice cream, obviously chock full of calories. But I was in ice cream heaven and, like all addicts, I wasn’t thinking straight. I was confronted with one of the hardest decisions of my life – what flavor should I go for. After about 10 minutes of walking up and down the aisle and peering rather seriously into every cooler, I finally decided on a double scoop of Jamocha Almond Fudge and Chocolate Escape.

Being Baskin and Robbins, it was rather pricey, but I suppose 69 baht for a double scoop of ice cream is a pretty good deal. I’m sure it’s at least double the price in other countries. It was worth every baht. The rich flavor and sublime creaminess tickled me all the way to my toes. It was an almost orgasmic experience that got me thinking: who needs a boyfriend when you have Baskin and Robbins?

After the sugar rush, however, I decided that a girl can’t live on Baskin and Robbins alone. She would definitely need a boyfriend…to buy her Baskin and Robbins. It makes perfect sense.

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I love the rain. The rain is a beautiful thing. I love walking in the soft drizzle and just feeling the tiny droplets on my face. I love listening to the rain pouring outside my window, especially while I sleep.

In Thailand, however, one can easily hate the rain. It could be perfectly sunny one moment and pouring the next. The rain in Thailand comes down without warning. And not only does it come down, it comes down in torrents. Buckets. You’re guaranteed to get drenched in less than a minute, which is exactly what happened to me as I was heading home. I keep forgetting to buy an umbrella, and I’m definitely getting a good, sturdy one tomorrow. That is, if this rain is ever going to stop.

If that isn’t bad enough, dig this: my area floods. If you’re unfortunate enough to be caught outside in a downpour, expect to wade in water at least 5 inches deep and pray there aren’t any potholes. It’s one of those rare moments when I’m thankful that I’m living on the 5th floor of an elevator-less building.

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I love corn. No, it’s not a typo, I do mean corn and not porn. (See, I love it so much that I can be corny too!)

Anyway, on my way home, I often pass through a market that always smells of that thing we leave in the toilet periodically. They sell some really interesting cuisine in this market, such as some mysterious animal’s tongue and fish heads the size of my own head. I was hurrying through the market when I saw this little old lady selling bags of huge yellow sweet corn. She was only selling them for 10 baht a bag, with 3 juicy ears of corn in each bag. I immediately bought one. I ate all three of them within minutes! And here you were, thinking I was buying them for another purpose. Nope, fresh produce is not my style.

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I don’t know if it was the rain, the ice cream, the cilantro-infested dish, the corn overload, or the fact that I just spent the last hour and a half hand washing my clothes, but I found myself crying. This is the first time I’ve cried since I got here. I always thought that I’d be crying everyday out of homesickness but I haven’t – until now.

I suppose it’s a good thing. It proves that I’m not such a bad person for not missing home more because I do, albeit slightly delayed. I just finished watching slideshows of pictures of my family and friends. I have also just finished crying hysterically. I miss my mum. I miss my sister. I miss my best friend. I miss all my friends, especially the ones at work. I miss my dogs. I miss lechon, adobo, sinigang, pochero, mum’s mango float that she told me she was making today, and Larsian. I miss having my own broadband Internet at home. I miss my bed. I miss having a helper to wash my clothes. I miss IT Park. Hell, I even miss my call center with its centralized air conditioning.

Yes, I miss a lot of things. And with that said, nope, I’m not coming home. I am home.